Best, especially in the face of adversity, when our very best matters most. I tell my children, “It’s Always easier to be happy when everything is going well. It’s Always easier to shine when the skies are blue. It’s Always easier to be nice when happiness is all around. But, right now, at this very moment, you’re not happy. Right now, you have choices to make. Are you going to make good choices? Or … bad choices?” And, through the tears and frustrations, calm sets in; followed by tentative nods of acknowledgement. “Good choices.”
Whether child or adult, it’s easy to falter in the face of adversity, no matter how much effort is made to prevent doing so. I understand that everyone makes mistakes. Mistakes are an integral part of human nature; lessons that allow the spirit to grow if heeded and converted to wisdom. Even then, human nature allows similar mistakes to be repeated … and often. That’s so cruel. I’ll be the first to admit that I have so much to learn and even though I think I’ve learned valuable lessons, I continue to make the same, or similar, mistakes. Within my prayers I ask for help. I ask for Almighty Intervention in order to prevent me from making mistakes that I’m going to regret. I’m assuming that the Gift of free will automatically denies my request, but I can still ask and I do ask constantly. It’s selfish to want actions taken for me when conditions dictate the need, but I am weak. I’m saddened by my own weakness.
I brood over my nature, especially after I realize that I’ve done something, or said something, that was destructive. “Why did I just do that?” Or … “Why did I just say that?” I get so irate at myself, but it’s too late. The damage is done. I think to myself, “I don’t do these things or say these things to my clients in a professional setting, why is it so easy for me to be so weak with the ones who matter most in my life?” Yes, I understand the psychology of why this happens, but it still doesn’t excuse the fact that it happens. Referring to a less than ideal situation, I also say that, “Just because something is the way it is, it doesn’t mean that it has to be that way.” In other words, “Don’t settle.”
My wife, my love, you give me too much credit. You and our children believe that I’m able to handle anything with great calm, but I’m only able to do so because I have Great Purpose. Even so, I still falter and I’m always full of regret when I do. Once in a while, and thankfully, not so often, I’ll fly off the handle and go off on an obnoxious tirade; usually over a small matter. Thankfully, you complement my action and stay calm, letting me do my thing. I’ll briefly walk away, regain my composure, take a deep breath, come back to you quietly, and say “I’m sorry.” We both have those times when the other has to be the foundation and stay composed; maintaining balance and facing adversity in stride, instead of reacting defensively and counterattacking with an additional barrage of unrelated accusations. We’re very lucky to have this balance and I pray that we will continue to have great respect for one another, loving each other unconditionally, nurturing our love for one another, being faithful to our lifelong commitment to honor each other with the best we have to offer to one another. Our children will witness our constant loving ways and hopefully, because of our example, we will nurture three more souls who will find their own loves, perpetuating our values and our ways, in their own personal manners, with great strength and vigor, accepting nothing less than the highest standards.
We’ll make mistakes. I understand. This is human nature. No one is perfect. It’s not easy to remain steadfast and place the other’s need ahead of our own, but that’s what we do. I’m so happy that we are always trying to place ourselves last in the order of things that need to be done. This devotion radiates an amazing selfless love that I will always strive to achieve. I know you will also, my love. Who needs easy when we gain the rewards from fulfilling what we know is worthwhile? It is in the giving that we receive.
Always and Forever, let’s stay strong, my love …
"Always and Forever" is a R&B song written by Rod Temperton and first recorded by the British-based multinational funk-disco band Heatwave in 1976. Released as a single in 1977, the song is included on Heatwave's debut album Too Hot to Handle and has been covered by numerous artists.